Bethany has worked here at HQ for a while. She is sort of a big-wig, and it's basically her job to take elderly VIPs out to lunch and dinner to convince them to give us money. She seems to be very, very good at this, but her personal life and persona are a little wonky, and I'm privy to a lot of her conversations with other employees, since my cubicle protrudes into her department's area here on the first floor. Based on looks alone, you'd never really know that Bethany was off her rocker. She looks like any other 50-something gal with her highlighted blonde bob and her expensive suits and her eerily wrinkle-free face. (Okay maybe she does have some wrinkles, but not nearly as many as most women her age. Bethany, if you are reading this, I'm trying to compliment you so that you don't hurt me, okay?)
It's the conversations she has with other people here in the office that are worrying. For example, at last year's Christmas party, we were supposed to bring in a silly gift for the white elephant exchange. Most people brought Bath & Body Works baskets they had been given in the 90s, back when B&BW was cool. Or games, snow globes, stuffed animals, or a variety of other chotchkies, like old vases (which is what I got, and I actually re-wrapped it and gave it to my dad, who thoroughly enjoys what he calls "mantle treasures"). So Bethany had brought in a gift, and one of the other ladies unwrapped it, and it turned out to be a series of picture frames hanging from a mini fishing pole. I'm sure it was a Hallmark creation.
As soon as the lady unwrapped it, Bethany shot up out of her chair with the bottled-up energy of a greyhound and frolicked across the room (she has since done this in many a staff meeting, though I have never gotten used to it). Bethany grabbed the picture frame thinger, waved it around her head in the air, and gleefully exclaimed, "I hope I'm not regifting something that Alice and her husband gave me!!!!!!!!!" Side note: Alice is married to Bethany's step-son, and she also works here. She is quite normal and has a great sarcastic sense of humor. She has mastered the eye roll...probably due to the fact that Bethany is her mother-in-law. So Bethany had just made this comment and the room went silent (actually, all conversation stopped the moment she sprung out of her seat). We all looked at Alice and saw that she was showing no emotion on her face. Ever so slowly, a smile forced its way through and she assured Bethany that no, they never gave her any fishing-inspired picture frames. Bethany smiled again, handed the gift back to the lady who had opened it, and skipped back to her chair. The rest of the room slowly resumed their conversations, but Janie and I could only look at each other as if to say, "What the eff just happened??"That was the first time that Janie and I deduced that Bethany wasn't as on-her-rocker as we had originally suspected. Over the next couple of months, we picked up on rumors and stories surrounding our barmy lady of mystery, and we figured out that she has been through sort of a rough life. So we felt bad for jumping to conclusions about her sanity. I mean, there are people out there who have been through a lot and genuinely need anti-depressants and other medications to help them through the day, and I fully support those people and wish them well. Bethany may be one of these people. But they do make her a bit...well...off. She can be totally normal sometimes, but I think maybe she's just one of those people who craves attention and has truly WILD thoughts that sometimes escape through her mouth. And apparently she has the energy of a four year old who has just eaten many candy bars. I really have no idea. It makes so much more sense now when I think about how Bethany and Ermatrude were BFF...before ol' Erm got fired, anyway. There was a whole lotta crazy between those two.
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